The Autumn of our lives… a time of change and many questions
Author: Jenny T
As we enter the transition from Summer to Autumn – when leaves are changing colour, plants regressing for their winter hibernation, perhaps a change of job or learning to live with an empty nest. For our resident blogger Jenny T, this time of change raises many important questions…
So, the heatwave is over. I can move out of my air-conditioned car and back into my house and stop eating Magnums and drinking buckets of Rosé with ice. I can start yoga again and even try the treadmill without having a god almighty hot flush – ‘because it’s piggin’ hot’ – and hopefully look to shift some of the magnum/rosé/no exercise puppy fat that is spilling over last year’s Zara go-to black trousers…
However, my memory is shot. So, I can’t remember last year. (Actually, I can’t remember yesterday.)
Question 1 – when is it OK to start wearing hosiery again? And do we morph from naked legs to a faint beige until we wallop into thick black tights in October? And how will these offending items help with the hot flushes and the rolling down over the excess muffin business? What did we do last year?
Question 2 – where does all the traffic come from? Being an empty nester, I was so used to a 20-minute drive to and from work and am very confused as to why it is now taking over an hour. Where do all these cars come from and how do I stop my blood pressure rising and WHY am I not allowed to multi-task whilst sitting in traffic? I can eat my breakfast, put my face on and text the lot of you all at the same time, why is this not allowed and why did that nasty man make rude hand signals at me?
Question 3 – why can’t our children play with conkers any more but why is my handbag stuffed full of them because someone’s Aunt told me that spiders are scared of them (and I’m scared of spiders – insert cartoon of me brandishing a conker at a spider saying ‘Go Away’.)
Question 4 – what about the duvet? The summer was unbearable. I didn’t just have one leg out, I had my whole body out and in fact slept in the car (see above). When are we supposed to put the winter duvet on, or the heating for that matter? Is a winter duvet even a thing for a menopausal woman? Shouldn’t we invent a menopause duvet that moderates itself during the night to our body temperature, soaks up the night sweat, cleans the house and delivers a cup of tea in the morning?
There are many more questions to come dear reader….